I am not the same, having seen the moon shine on the other side of the world.
Mary Anne Radmacher
The temple is so beautiful. It has 4 main entrances and covers 17 acres in the middle of Madurai. No traffic is allowed for the block around the temple because it is usually so crowded with people that there is no room for it anyway. The streets around the temple are brick streets, which are very nice here. We had to go through security to even get into the temple. When I went through I got padded down and she went through the things in my purse and she pulled out lip gloss (of course!) and she looked at it like it was the dirt of the earth. She said "lipstick?!" in the most disgusting voice and I told her it was and she stuffed it back in and waved me on. It was so strange. Usha thought it was hilarious and wouldn't stop giggling once we got in. This is a picture of one of the four entrances of the temple. All of them are repainted every 12 years.
Usha and a few others and I were walking around the outside of the temple and she started speed walk, so I started to walk faster to keep up with her. Pretty soon it was just us and she told me she had something to talk about just between us. I got a little worried and she asked me what was not ok about asking me if I was fatter in my license picture. I tried to explain to her that its not kind to make comments about weight to someone--she listened so intently. After that she asked me which person I had met in India was my favorite. I looked at her like....are you serious Usha? And she started laughing and asked me if that was an ok question. I told her, sure it is ok, but it's akward. Then I told her she was my favorite:)
On the way to the museum part of the temple, there is a god in the form of a bull. Usha said it is the god that relays messages so people tell the bull their worries and concerns. People would touch their heads and then touch it's head on their way by. There were also several small lit and burnt out candles around it. Here is the messenger bull:
Remember when I said that people will ask to have their pictures taken? These were a couple of people who asked me inside the temple. The man in black just pointed at my camera and smiled, so I took a picture. The little boy was begging and asked for a picture, and the older man asked was just walking by outside the temple and asked for a picture. Usually I show them the picture after I take it and they always thank me. I haven't come upon anyone who doesn't want their picture taken, even for sick/recovering/injured people in the hospital. Uma says they like it, and everyone seems to enjoy it. Isn't the picture of the older man just perfect?!
People here are funny about getting your email address/phone number. Men will ask for your telephone first and then if you say no, they ask for your ID. At first I was like, UM no, I am not giving you my license, but then I realized that meant e-mail. They also ask for your date of birth so that they can wish you a happy birthday.
Siva, a translator got my e-mail address (ID) a few days ago. I have gotten an obnoxious amount of random emails from him since then. The last one said 'I am very very happy today'. I think what he meant to say was that he had a good time today. Akward. Professional relationships here are not like they are in the states.
I thought there would be some sort of inside type grocery store here. The only place I have found to buy food is on the streets or in side shops that are open to the streets. If I get a diet soda, which I search a million shops for, I will have to take it home and wash off the outside of the can because it is caked in dirt and oils if the place is also selling food. I got the cookies we have been served here to bring home and the chocolate that they sell at all of the shops too.
Here is how the majority of the food is sold. Its beautiful and fresh but so dirty. One macho man in the mountain ecosystems class ate food from the roadside and he puked all the way to madurai until his eyes were blood red. It was awful.
I practiced my gaydar with Usha when we were walking around the temple. (Gramps/Granny: gaydar is supposedly being able to tell if someone is gay or not by observation. :)) We had talked about what is male heterosexual touching this weekend, but apparently I hadn't learned well enough. I told her how/where people accept homosexuality in the states and she said she knows her professor is gay, but he asked her not to tell because it would ruin his position.
So men wear these skirt like things here, called dhotis/lungis. Some are considered really nice and some are just cloth tied around their waists. Sometimes they retie them/adjust them and I have seen a few things I wish I hadn't. My friend Megan got two for her brothers. Oh, dhotis.
When I try to buy scarfs, people selling them try to sell me 'Sunday Monday' scarfs. Its supposed to mean reversible. They always put it in your face and flip it back and forth and say 'Sunday Monday Madam, Good Quality!"
Sometimes parents will point at our white entourage or sometimes just me and Emily, and their kids will just stare. Usually if its a little kid I will wave at them and squat down to their level and smile at them. If they are really brave they like to touch my hands. The mothers think it is so funny.
Today is the first day of Pongal, a harvest festival here where they thank the sun. It is a lot like our thanksgiving. They buy new clothes and it is especially important for people who have cows. We are going to go visit a place where female sex workers go for healthcare on Wednesday. Prostitution is legal here and in Mumbai, the city we flew in to, there are 100,00 sex workers and 1/2 are HIV positive.
The salwar/kameez I wore yesterday was the most uncomfortable thing I have ever worn. There aren't really sizes on clothing unless you get in made, so the pants are all HUGE in the waist. It didn't have a drawstring and I had to wear a belt to keep it up. There was tufts of cloth tucked everywhere. Must not have looked that bad, because my professor really liked it and said she would buy it off of me. We bought her the exact one in pink today for a gift. We also are framing some cute pictures of her and her husband on the trip. Here is a picture of the class, with the professor in the back. You can kind of see my salwar. Our class is a mixture of PhD, grad, and undergrad students. Most people are grad students.
Inside the temple there was a painted elephant that blessed you by putting its trunk on your head if you put money in its trunk. Usha said that it was trained to not bless you if you didn't give it enough money---as in it can tell the difference between the coins. I couldn't believe the coin didn't disappear down it's trunk. Usha said that even the animals here are taught to beg...
Inside the temple there were a lot of statues. For Hindus, these are a variety of gods. There are gods of all manifestations, like birth, education, marriage, etc. There are three main gods though: God of Creation, Destruction, and Preservation. The temple is named Meenakshi Temple after Meenakshi, the consort (wife) of one of the gods. Most cities are based on a certain male god, so kings are more important. The nursing superintendent said that here in Madurai, queens rule, so it is a good place for me:)
Normally you find tons of candles lit in front of the gods that people light and leave there. They are little tiny ones so there are just as many burnt out ones as burning ones. There is a god of childbirth, and she wears several skirts tied around her frontside. Usha said that most people will not see that part of the god. People pray and offer to it for a healthy childbirth. Here, you can see it with the skirt tied around it. They sell the same skirts at stands.
The ceiling was beautiful inside the temple. Here is a little bit of how it looked.
Each of the designs inside the circle is unique throughout the ceiling of the entire building. In the middle of the temple there is an area that is open to the air and it has water and a giant pure gold flower. Here is a jpeg of what the pure gold flower looks like, because it was too dark to take a picture when I was there. https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7sOKtDgvbA-8MB8qxY4I2hUH-JeX1a6gU2SEBxWS8k0tuD6PoIq9SnaPoR-FhyphenhyphenGllOyqp1SpGZYwDoh_UTv1APLQkQrXaOrTAW1zqAfrbezVUwj5tQHPaEIedCcFKQ2hzlTAzSSOow6s/s400/LOTUS+IN+TANK.JPG
The line to see the Meenakshi god (godess which the temple was named after) was several hours long. One of the girls in our group said that you only get a second to see it when you get to it anyways. As always, if you pay, you can get ahead in the line. Also, there was a huge golden pole next to a statue of meenakshi and shiva getting married and when people walked in the would drop down to the ground, belly and face down, completely flat. Some would touch their forehead and then get back up. Hinduism is the most common religion here and it has affected the way I work with women a lot. Some think that cancer is just bad karma and if they have it it is a death sentence or that they deserved it. A lot of women (Liz told me) say that all they know that is if you have cancer you die. Because everyone hears about cancer on soap operas, she thinks they get the idea for TV, but who knows. Rose mary said that women don't know anything about cervical cancer, or that it even exists. Some women in rural villages say that they think it is such a problem because women's health problems are less than mens. Also a rural woman said that women should teach each other about cervical cancer, which is basically how our project functions, from bottom up---from woman to woman and from village health nurse to woman. It will also be in hospitals and working it's way down to women, so our project will be functioning in a variety of different ways after we leave.
There were hundreds of beautifully sculpted pillars/columns in the temple. There is a myth that one of them plays music if you hit it. Angana, a translator, and I ran around and were wacking columns. We found the one that plays music but you have to hit different parts of the column to make different pitches. We thought it would be flute music or something. Rosemary paid the guard off to let us play the musical column.
Usha got Emily and I a beautiful bangle!
There have been these men walking around in black dhotis (skirt like cloths) and orange necklaces since we got here. They always scan us and just stare. I found out from Usha that during the months of November and December they dress in black and have a set of rules they have to follow. They can't eat any meat and they have to resist sweet and indulgent food. Also, they cannot talk to women or think about them sexually, even their wife. They can't do anything sexually with her for the two months. They are also supposed to resist anger and extreme emotions. Here was a picture of them walking down the streets. These aren't wearing dhotis, but most people in black are, because it gets so hot in full outfits.
So, I saw a guy get hit on the street the other day. He was just walking down the street and someone came whizzing by and hit him. The only thing that happened were a few scrapes and his button up shirt got ripped off. I also saw a bus hit a jeep like thing. I got tapped by a motorcycle the other night. I about crapped, but he just drove off.
Remember a long time ago when I said that there were earmuff stands everywhere? Usha told me it is because of the chill in the winter season. FYI it has been 85-90 the whole time we have been here....I tried to explain the 'chill' at home to her.
Women honor you by putting a powdered bindi on your forehead or by putting jasmine flowers in your hair. They smell so wonderful. Before we entered the temple, Rosemary put them in our hair. Here is Em and I with our jasmine. It's wonderful how close I have become with some of the people on this trip:) We are planning a bar crawl when we get back, and we will go bindis, saris and all!! Also, the other picture is of me in my salwar/kameez. They are more informal than saris. You take off your shoes before entering the temple, as you can see. And there are cows and babies pooping all over the streets...
Speaking of babies pooping on the streets, one of our groups did a program working with infant diarrhea. They said they asked the mom if her baby had ever had diarrhea and she said no. He was naked and had diarrhea all over the floor after that. Megan also said that there was a woman walking down the street and her baby had diarrhea on the street and that the mom wiped the baby's butt clean with her hand. Awesome.
So, we went to a house supported by Russ Foundation. It was a home that female sex workers (prostitutes) can get support and healthcare. Its focus was HIV/AIDS education and prevention. There is 6000 female sex workers in Madurai, 2100 of which are served by the Russ Foundation. While we were at the drop in health clinic, we got to hear a lot of interesting stories.
To help reduce HIV/AIDS transmission they were really pushing male and female condom use. Male condoms were very cheap because they were government subsidized, whereas female condoms were expensive because they were imported from the UK, because they are not made here. There are little things like this that I see a lot that remind me over and over that women are not equal here. The manager said some doctors don't even know what a female condom is. He also said that even though they are running a HIV/AIDS prevention program, they don't tell the sex workers to not continue working when they have HIV. Uma said that if the program told them to stop having sex for money that they would have to give them money to live and they don't have that money.
We got on the topic of domestic abuse because the younger HIV+ sex worker there was from Chennai and has lost her mother and her father was abusive. She left the home and got into the sex industry. Her name was Priya. The manager of the center, a SOCIAL worker, said that almost all men physically abuse their wives or children and that no one would complain unless got serious. He acted like we were stupid and naive to think a woman should report domestic abuse. We also asked if they offered/could refer the women to any other homes/opportunities instead of going into prostitution, and he said that there was only so much work that he could offer. He started to defend himself and he said that there was no way prostitution could be eliminated and as long as there are humans, there will be prostitution. Again he said it in a really disturbing way. Sometimes the women only get 5 or 10 rupees for a 'client' as they called it. Just for comparison, an orange is usually 5 rupees and a bottle of water is 20-50 rupees. A woman would have to have sex with 4 men to get the bottle of water I am drinking now. It's very sad. Even though Priya is HIV+, she still works...
The clinic is for health/mental health services. Mental health reminds me that being gay/lesbian here is still written in books as a 'psychiatric disorder'. There is obviously some advancement needed there. They also offer educational support there. There was a lady there name Nila (moon) that served us coffee/tea and cookies. She was a post operative transsexual that had lived at the clinic for 2 years because she left her family to go through the transformation. Nila was her new name that her mother had picked out after her surgery. Her mother visits her every now and then but her father does not at all. She is going to college now, whereas most transsexuals are involved in the sex industry here. She was beautiful. Our professor told her she was beautiful and asked her if she was happy, she said she was. I asked if she had been on hormone therapy and she said she was for about 2 months, until she got the results she wanted. I told Uma I couldn't believe that they offer sex reassignment surgeries here, with all of the poverty and other issues going on. It was a dumb thought, because no matter where you go in the world, there will be people facing common health issues, like sexuality. I asked them if there is vaginal reconstruction and he said there is. He also said it is extremely expensive, so the people in the situation save for years. He said that to raise money, they will go in front of shops and do this loud clap noise and the shop is supposed to give the person who clapped money or there will be violence. I'm not sure if I understood that right, because that seems very strange. Nila showed us how she had gotten really good at this clap noise. I asked her if she had a partner and she said she didn't but that there was someone that was in love with her. (Remember, love is more scandalous here. Everyone giggled when she said that.) She said she cooks well and makes good coffee.
Prostitution is completely legal, except for brothels. Sometimes women do get arrested (the men with them usually get no penalties) and the women go to jail. The manager said that sometimes, if the girl is really pretty, advocates (lawyers) will bail the girl out of jail and then own her.
Women have to pay a price/dowry for a man.
There are over 250 characters in the Tamil alphabet.
Women go into prostitution for a lot of reasons. One that was common that really surprised me was that the husband will force his wife to go into the industry, to make more money if she cannot get a job. I asked Uma if they weren't aware of how much harm they would end up causing themselves and he just shrugged his shoulders. Also, women as young as 13 are forced into it. Women who are widowed or feel that they have no other options to provide for their family do too. One of the older prostitutes (Uma said they are as young as 13 and as old as 50) said that she had been in the industry since she was 20. She had deep black bags under her eyes. She was widowed and was struggling with money and her friends suggested that sex work would be better than suffering.
We asked the women how many men usually use condoms and they said that sometimes when the men are drunk they will threaten to kill their children if the woman makes them wear a condom or threaten them in some other way. They seemed so nonchalant when they told us all of this.
We asked the women what they would do if they got pregnant and they both answered (as well as the manager) that they would just get an abortion. Like it was no big deal. If that older woman had been in the industry for ~20 years she has to have had at least 20 abortions. Government hospitals provide them for free, but Uma said some 'quacks' do it to. As in some random people do it too. He said he has heard of self abortions by using a hair pin/stick/knitting needle. I'm still upset writing about it.
We learned where prostitution usually occurs. Usually it is street based (pick up client on street and go to a 'hot spot') They really used that term. They said that condoms are handed out at the hot spots. He said there is no 'red light district' like in bigger cities in Madurai, but there is in bigger cities. Also, there are brothels or whorehouses, which are illegal. Some are also lodge (hotel) based.
During pongal, there is sugar cane being sold/being used as a decoration/being processed EVERYWHERE. They peel little strips off of it and you can suck on them. We had some for lunch today.
Yesterday, I was the arm used in a mehandi competition. It was only for doctors at the hospital, and a dermatology doctor did mine. It was her first time doing it, and she did a wonderful job. We weren't close to winning, but here is one side:
There is a carnival going on at the hospital for the whole month of January for the doctors. After the mehandi competition there was a team looking up you tube dance videos in the telemedicine room and trying to practice them. It was so hilarious. I told them you would never see doctors in the states doing that and so they got more obnoxious:). I'll definitely still dance to bollywood videos when I'm a doctor!!
I experienced my first rain here. We were at an HIV/AIDS community for families in which the parents were HIV+/had AIDS. I had to go the bathroom so bad, so a older lady held my hand and took me to and indian toilet. I checked it for snakes and was about to go but she wouldn't shut the door. She said "Please, sit." I did and just went the bathroom while she was there. Whatever. She started to tell me about her sons and how educated they were. Mothers here love to share it if their kids are 1-married 2-have kids 3-are educated. It seems to be the ultimate pride.
Today we did our final presentation to the hospital. It went awesome and went over very well with everyone. Dr. Umashankar was especially excited. My professor said she was very proud too. Overall-- good results!
I am leaving Madurai for Chennai in a few hours, at 4AM here. From there on our I will either be on plane or bus until Iowa City: 12 hour bus ride, 2 hour plane, 8 hour plane, 8 hour plane, 4 hour bus ride, not including any layovers. I can't wait to share stories, gifts, and food from here with you! Thank you Chels, Em, Mom, Dad, Dusty, Em, and Livfor meeting me in Iowa City! Yahoo!
LOVE YOU!
Jackie
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